Andrew's Weiner

The interwebs and TV have been a buzz about this 'lewd' photo that was sent to a 21 year old female, via Twitter, by none other than old and jewy Representative Andrew Weiner of New York. Now I love a good government-penis scandal like any good gay, so I immediately jumped on Google when I heard the good news. As I typed 'Andrew Weiner's wiener' into the Google, I could feel the anticipation building...

Now, I'm considered an expert at crotch shots by some in my circle, but I have to admit that it took me a second to figure out what was going on here. LEWD?!? What a let down. Where's the flesh? Lewd would be Weiner giving a rusty trombone to a grandma tranny in a dirty truck stop bathroom. I mean, give. me. a break.

So this is the news? This is what America is all worked up about? What a bunch of idiots. This amounts to nothing more than a little (bad choice of words) morning wood, snugly chilling out in some boxer briefs. This is a GUY. Guys get hard-ons. Hard-ons are fun to share. Even on Twitter.

I know this guy is married, but he's on Twitter. I know he lied about sending the picture (before finally admitting it), but let's stop pretending people are honest. If you say you don't lie, then you are dumb. I know he's a Congressman, but who cares. I've done far worse, as I'm sure most of you have, and this country would be lucky for me to dispense some of my advice in Congress.

I don't claim to know if Rep. Weiner is actually a good Congressman. In fact, I never heard about him until his dork ended up on the internet. What I do know, is that taking a picture of his joystick and sending it to a woman on the internet doesn't necessarily make him a bad one. It does make him a guy, in 2011, who has a laptop and a pretty nice rocket.

So lighten up America. Shut it, wake up, get smart and pay attention to what actually matters. I assure you that the shitty job our government is doing has nothing to do with Weiner's wiener. However, they love that you think it does.